A Day in the Life

After three months of working my ass off, I'm finally starting to see some concrete results. I've officially had one offer that didn't get accepted, two contracts that didn't make it past the option period, and now I have closed one deal fully and have at least three more contracts (hopefully) in the works for October. I can't WAIT to see a paycheck with a dollar amount on it other than zero! Had to share you guys, love y'all! :)

And now on the lighter side of things, here's a joke My Shelly sent me. This right here is Rory in heaven. :) A cat died and went to Heaven. God met her at the gates and said, "You have been a good cat all these years. Anything you want is yours for the asking." The cat thought for a minute and then said, "All my life I lived on a farm and slept on hard wooden floors. I would like a real fluffy pillow to sleep on." God said, "Say no more." Instantly the cat had a huge fluffy pillow. A few days later, six mice were killed in an accident and they all went to Heaven together. God met the mice at the gates with the same offer that He made to the cat. The mice said, "Well, we have had to run all of our lives: from cats, dogs, and even people with brooms! If we could just have some little roller skates, we would not have to run again." God answered, "It is done." All the mice had beautiful little roller skates. About a we...

Here's one My Shelly sent to me about a month ago that I'm just getting around to posting. I totally agree with it tho! :) We're sticking the next generation with debt and an unjust war. Solution: We must cut healthcare for people with "Bush-Cheney" bumper stickers. By Garrison Keillor Aug. 30, 2006 | It's the best part of summer, the long lovely passage into fall. A procession of lazy golden days that my sandy-haired, gap-toothed little girl has been painting, small abstract masterpieces in tempera and crayon and glitter, reminiscent of Franz Kline or Willem de Kooning (his early glitter period). She put a sign out front, "Art for Sale," and charged 25 cents per painting. Cheap at the price. A teacher gave her this freedom to sit unselfconsciously and put paint on paper. A gentle 6-foot-8 guy named Matt who taught art at her preschool. Her swimming teachers gave her freedom from fear of water. So much that has made this summer a pleasure for her I t...

Okay, one last post for today and it's short. This one's from my Mom-Person's sweetie and it made me laugh out loud! I get so confused by pop culture... Was JonBenet the one who shot Joey Buttafucco because he cut off the penis of Tonya Harding's husband, OJ Simpson?

Here are a couple of funnies from my Mom-Person. :)

Here's one Billy sent a while back that is classic. I could SO see my friends doing this!!! :) During the big DUI Dragnet, a Highway Patrolman waited outside a popular local bar, hoping for a bust. At closing time as everyone came out, he spotted his potential quarry. The man was so obviously inebriated that he could barely walk. He stumbled around the parking lot for a few minutes, looking for his car. After trying his keys on five others, he finally found his own vehicle. He sat in the car a good ten minutes as the other patrons left. He turned his lights on, then off, wipers on then off. He started to pull forward into the grass, then stopped. Finally when he was the last car, he pulled out onto the road and started to drive away. The Patrolman, waiting for this, turned on his lights and pulled the man over. He administered the breathalizer test, and to his great surprise the man blew a 0.00. The Patrolman was dumbfounded. "This equipment must be broken," exclaimed the...

Time to work on cleaning out the inbox today so I'm going to post some funnies for y'all to enjoy. Here's one stolen from Da Jules myspace bulletin from weeks ago... EMBARRASSING MEDICAL EXAMS A man comes into the ER and yells; "My wife's going to have her baby in the cab!" I grabbed my stuff, rushed out to the cab, lifted the lady's dress, and began to take off her underwear. Suddenly I noticed that there were several cabs ---and I was in the wrong one. Submitted by Dr. Mark MacDonald, San Antonio, TX. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~`` At the beginning of my shift I placed a stethoscope on an elderly and slightly deaf female patient's anterior chest wall. "Big breaths," I instructed. "Yes, they used to be," replied the patient. Submitted by Dr. Richard Byrnes, Seattle, WA ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~`` One day I had to be the bearer of bad news when I told a wife that her husband had died of a massive myoca...

Dear Friends and Family, I recently accepted the challenge to raise funds to support the Komen Dallas Race for the Cure on October 21, 2006 in the fight against breast cancer. One in eight women will be stricken with breast cancer in her lifetime and the more we raise, the more the Dallas of the Susan G. Komen Breast Cancer Foundation can give back to fund vital breast cancer education, screening and treatment programs in our own community and support the national search for a cure. Please join me in the fight by pledging in support of my participation in the Race or contributing generously to Komen Dallas. Your tax-deductible contribution will fund innovative outreach and awareness programs for medically underserved communities in Dallas and national breast cancer research. It is faster and easier than ever to support this great cause - you can make a donation online by simply clicking on the link at the bottom of this message. If you would prefer, you can also send your tax-deductibl...

So who all is planning to brave the weather and come to the parade today? We'll be out there so I hope we cy'all!!

Brian and I did this last year (as you can read below) and we're trying to get a team together to do it again this year. Let me know if you're interested, it's a stupidly early morning event but it's a really good cause. :) Hey everybody! The Race is coming up next month - October 21st to be exact. Last year I was able to raise a good amount of money, and did the 1K walk with Jenni. We had a really good time, and were surprised at how short 1K actually is! Anyway, I was still a student at UTD at the time and joined the team the UTD Women's Center had formed. Since I'm no longer a student... I was wondering if anybody would be interested in forming our own team this year? I'd love it if we could get a few more people involved this year and actually walk the full 5K this time. (really, it's not that far--and I'm *certainly* not going to be racing competitively!!) So please take a second to let me know if you'd be interested.. And if you ...

Happily stole this from Bobbie's myspace bulletin. :) Only a Southerner knows the difference between a hissy fit and a conniption fit, and that you don't "HAVE" them, you "PITCH" them. ____ Only a Southerner knows how many fish, collard greens, turnip greens, peas, beans, etc., make up "a mess." _____ Only a Southerner can show or point out to you the general direction of "yonder." _____ Only a Southerner knows exactly how long "directly" is, ... as in: "Going to town, be back directly." _____ Even Southern babies know that "Gimme some sugar" is not a request for the white, granular sweet substance that sits in a pretty little bowl in the middle of the table. _____ All Southerners can tell the difference between a Georgian accent, a New Orleans accent, a Texan accent, etc. and know which part of the state you come from by your accent. _____ All Southerners know exactly when "by and by" is. They migh...

I'm not going to go on and on about this today but it is definitely in my thoughts. At the time I was receiving so many emails on the subject that I actually made a little website about it. Feel free to go check it out . Hope everyone has a great day!

In my previous post about the gay sheep experiments, I failed to do all the necessary research and am now retracting my support. Read this article to find out why. I've emailed PETA to take my name off the petition and Brian , who also reposted it, has submitted it to Snopes and TruthorFiction. My apologies to all of you who followed my recommendation and signed the petition. :-(

I'm sorry I haven't been very good about an update post and it's cuz I haven't had a day off in several weeks now. B had a Talk with me about working all the time today so I'm going to start setting better boundaries for myself and should have time to write soon. Wonder what's going on with me? It's work, and work is great but all work and no play makes Jen a very grumpy girl. Love and miss you guys!

Glen and Da Jules both posted this myspace bulletin and I HAD to do the same. Everyone please take a moment and do this... "These experimenters believe that homosexuality is a defect that needs to be fixed, and they're cutting open and killing gay sheep to do it. Roselli has made it very clear that he intends to use the findings of his experiments to cure humans next." Please go to the link below and join the protest against this cruel, homophobic "research." http://getactive.peta.org/campaign/p2gaysheepexperiments?c=p2ggsheep PLEASE REPOST THIS NOW

I've been amassing a few things that I've been meaning to share about out here. I think now is as good a time as any... Olay has a new product called Body Ribbons . It's a moisturizing soap that lathers better than anything and smells really good (although girlie, sorry boys!). I had the opportunity to product test it a while back and it finally hit the market. It's my new soap! :) Since we've been eating at home more, I've been exploring the world of frozen food. Most of it is complete shite but Bertolli has a frozen pasta skillet meal line that's surprisingly good. They're prepackaged full pasta meals and the two we've tried have been better than any frozen food has a right to be. The best part is they cook up in a skillet in about 10 minutes. They come in bags, check em out! The Henry Rollins Show on Saturday nights on IFC is totally worth watching. Mostly it's Hank ranting on about stuff but he always has one interview guest and one band. W...

I just got done sending this in an email to all my clients but I thought it was good enough to share. :) Here are a few things to think about today: Sometimes it's important to work for that pot of gold. But other times it's essential to take time off and to make sure that your most important decision in the day simply consists of choosing which color to slide down on the rainbow. - Douglas Pagels, These Are the Gifts I'd Like to Give to You Labor Day is a glorious holiday because your child will be going back to school the next day. It would have been called Independence Day, but that name was already taken. - Bill Dodds This one is for the one who drives the big rig, up and down the road. Or the one out in the warehouse, bringing in the load. Or the waitress, the mechanic, the policeman on patrol. For everyone who works behind the scenes. With a spirit you can't replace with no machine. Hello, America, Let me thank you for your time. - Alabama, Forty Hour Week (For a ...