Showing posts from April, 2006

Wanna Feel Like a Woman?

LOL! This one's from Country Shelli and it made me actually giggle out loud so I'm passing it on...hope y'all enjoy it! :)

On a transatlantic flight, a plane passes through a severe storm.

The turbulence is awful, and things go from bad to worse when one wing is struck by lightning. One woman in particular loses it.

Screaming, she stands up in the front of the plane. "I'm too young to die!" she wails. Then she yells, "Well, if I'm going to die, I want my last minutes on earth to be memorable! Is there anyone on this plane who can make me feel like a WOMAN?"

For a moment there is silence. Everyone has forgotten their own peril. They all stare, riveted, at the desperate woman in the front of the plane.

Then a man from Texas stands up in the rear of the plane. He is handsome: tall, well built, with dark brown hair and hazel eyes. He starts to walk slowly up the aisle, unbuttoning his shirt.

..... One button at a time......

..... No one moves..............

What Your Pet Does While You're at Work

Billy forwarded me these pix and they were just too funny not to share. Ever wonder what your animals do all day while you're working? Here are a few ideas...happy Friday! :)

Things You Should Know But Probably Don't

This one comes from my beloved stepmonster and I knew some of this stuff but not all of it. Trivia for your heads on a Wednesday. :)

1. Money isn't made out of paper; it's made out of cotton. (Had too many bills go thru the wash not to know this one.)
2. The Declaration of Independence was written on hemp paper. (Seems like the forefathers had the right idea!)
3. The dot over the letter I is called a "tittle." (That sounds like something you would do to a nipple! LOL!)
4. A raisin dropped in a glass of fresh champagne will bounce up and down continuously from the bottom of the glass to the top. (I gotta try this cuz I'm a geek like that.)
5. Susan Lucci is the daughter of Phyllis Diller. (Didn't know it...)
6. 40% of McDonald's profits come from the sales of Happy Meals. (Doesn't surprise me since all children are drawn to the Golden Arches like junkies.)
7. 315 entries in Webster's 1996 Dictionary were misspelled. (Shouldn't the editors have gotten…

News of Jen

Hello blog world! I'm long overdue for an update post and a lot's going on, so lemme get this thing started. :)

I'm about to fall of the planet again because I start back working nights as of tonight. I'll be working 6p-6a Tues-Thu nights through the end of May to help get our finances back where they need to be. As assignments go, this one is choice duty: I'll be sitting inside a hospital behind a locked glass door that I control. B is *so* relieved he won't hafta worry about me and honestly I think that's the only reason he went along with the plan. Of course, it was either go back to nights or start stripping again so he didn't have many good choices. LOL! I'm working very hard to try and get a laptop so that I'll be able to do web dev while I'm sitting there looking official all night. The idea of getting to double bill my hours doesn't suck either! :) If anyone has any good resources for laptops for cheap, please share, otherwise I&#…

Save The Internet!

This is some bullshit right here and we all need to take action immediately! Thanks to Andy for starting this blog post, please repost it everywhere and send messages!

How would you like Verizon to decide what what websites you can visit? Or AT&T to determine if the Republican Party website will load faster or slower than the Democratic Party Website? Want Comcast determining what search engines you can use?

It's important to realize that in the course of the next few weeks we could lose the democratic nature of the internet. How? In a word, congress. And as little as I like Republicans, Democrats are equally to blame for this one. Both parties are on their knees to offer full service to the major telcom companies.

Here's the deal:

Last fall, however, the Federal Communications Commission, backed by the U.S. Supreme Court, decided that the high-speed Internet services offered by the cable and telephone companies didn’t fall under that law, the Communications Act. Out the w…

Miss Cinder :)

Cinder is improving still, she's getting mouthier and is starting to get her muscle strength back. (She fought me pretty hard this morning on the meds. ;-)) Her digestive system is coming back online and she's processing food again. She looks to have eaten a pretty decent amount of food during the night which makes me very happy indeed! Honestly, I think we're out of the woods on the worst of this situation and as soon as she's enough better, we're gonna need to get her back to the doc to make sure there's nothing else we need to deal with. Since Rory had diabetes, I'm a little concerned that she might have it too. This will be the last of the Cinder-specific blog posts unless something unexpected happens. Thanks SO much to everyone for your thoughts, prayers, wishes for her health!!! Love you guys!

Memories of me?

I see all kinds of ridiculous things circulate on Myspace and usually ignore junk bulletins that get reposted over and over. This one, however, struck me fun and I thought it would translate well out here. This one's stolen from Julie, thanks for finding it girlie! :)

Leave one memory of you and me together as a comment on this post-- it doesn't matter if I know you a little or a lot, anything you remember! Next, re-post this on your blog and see how many people leave a memory about you. It's actually pretty cool to see the responses. Hope y'all will play along! :)

Cinder... showing more improvement as of this morning, yay! She is more mobile (although still definitely weak) and even had the energy to fight with me a little over her meds. I definitely think the struggle is a positive sign! She does still seem weak, but she managed to keep the food down from last nite and it even looks like she nibbled at the dry food we kept out overnight for her. The princess bed seems to be a big hit and she's still hanging out in there this morning. Looks like we may need to get the kid her own bed when this has all passed! ;-) I am starting to have real hope that she's going to pull thru this and that maybe she just got depressed and made herself sick. We're still gonna keep a close eye on her throughout the weekend so keep checking back for updates. Thanks to everyone for keeping her in your thoughts, I'm *so* not ready to be an empty-nester!

Cinder Update

I have positive news on the kitty front! :) Cinder is still quite weak because she hasn't been eating properly for several days now, but the antibiotics seem to be starting to make a difference. I'm hoping this trend will continue, but am trying not to get my hopes up too high. B stopped at Petco on the way home and got extra special kitty supplies for her. We gave her a dry bath with that no-water type soap and got her cleaned up quite a bit. She hasn't been grooming properly since she's been feeling sick and even before that, but I thought she was just depressed about Rory. Anyway, she's much cleaner than she was and she purred the whole time we were rubbing on her except around her belly which seems to be sensitive right now. After her bath, we got her to eat about a tablespoon full of some gourmet, wet cat food (he got the kind for seniors so it would be easy on her tummy). Hopefully her body will process it normally, it's hard to know since she hasn't …

Please Think Happy Thoughts

Cinder is officially sick as of today. She's been acting puny for a few days and hiding under the bed so we finally took her to the doc today. Instead of spending the ridiculous amount of money it was going to take (that we don't have) to run all the tests on her, we let them hydrate her and give her an antibiotic. We'll be doing the meds all weekend and if she's going to show marked improvement, we should see it by Sunday at the latest. Y'all please think happy thoughts, I'm not sure I can lose all the pets in the house and still be a sane human being. All prayers, thoughts, wishes, happily accepted.

Happy Holiday Everyone!

Hope everyone has a wonderfully green day today! :)

Who Would Slaughter Me In a Horror Movie?

Believe it or not, this movie actually scared me a bit and that's saying something since I'm relatively jaded about these sorts of things. LOL!

Who Would Slaughter You in a Horror Movie? Find out @ She's Crafty


Here's a little sentimental post on a Monday morning. I had a couple of different friends email this one to me so I thought I'd pass on the love. Hope everyone had a great weekend! :)

People come into your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime. When you know which one it is, you will know what to do for that person.

When someone is in your life for a REASON, it is usually to meet a need you have expressed. They have come to assist you through a difficulty, to provide you with guidance and support, to aid you physically, emotionally or spiritually. They may seem like a godsend and they are. They are there for the reason you need them to be. Then, without any wrongdoing on your part or at an inconvenient time, this person will say or do something to bring the relationship to an end. Sometimes they die. Sometimes they walk away. Sometimes they act up and force you to take a stand. What we must realize is that our need has been met, our desire fulfilled, their work is done. T…

In the Interest of Saving Money...

I've officially dropped the next class on my schedule and will be on a two-week break from school. It's not a required class for my salesperson's license and I can retake it in the fall when I have a little more money to spare and hopefully gas prices won't be so outrageous. I'll be going back for the test prep class two nights during the first week of May. For all of my Tarrant County friends, thanks a million for helping me get through this period of commuting and giving me places to hang out! I'm gonna miss y'all!!!!

This Is Worth Checking Out!

IFC has seen fit to give one of my favorite pop culture icons his own talk show: Henry Rollins. Yes, I know it's hard to believe that the man who wrote TV Party has now grown up enough to host a talk show, but it's really edgy and B and I are thoroughly enjoying it! This will be the third week of the show but we have the first two episodes saved on the DVR if anyone wants to check it out, I believe they're also available online for viewing. Here's the site if you guys want more info:

The Henry Rollins Show

It's most definitely worth checking out! :)

Overdue Update Post

Hello fair readers! :) I know it's been a little while since I posted an update, so let me see if I can catch you up on what's been going on with me...

I'm finally getting caught back up with my school stuff and am *almost* back to current. I'm only weeks away from finishing and am getting very excited about being done! Teehee, this is why I only committed to a short term school program, I knew that I would be mentally over a 4 year degree long before it was over! LOL! Because of some unexpected financial things and the sudden rise in gas prices which is killing me with the commute to Tarrant County 4x a week, I'm going to have to take a break between the time I pass my real estate test and the time I officially start working in the industry to get our finances back in line. I'm probably heading back to the night shift, fyi, but it shouldn't be nearly as hard since I won't be trying to multitask it with school. I'm giving serious thought to going bac…

A Rant To Start the Weekend...

Here's a terrific (albeit pretty harsh) rant about the pro-life legislation happening in South Dakota. It's most definitely worth a read and thanks a million to Cyndi for sending it along! :)

Fuck South Dakota

Because I'm a Man

Okay I'm actually not a man biologically but I can most definitely relate to some of these and they crack me up! Thanks to My Shelly for this one! :)

Because I'm a Man

Because I'm a man, when I lock my keys in the car, I will fiddle with a coat hanger long after hypothermia has set in. Calling AAA is not an option. I will win.

Because I'm a man, when the car isn't running very well, I will pop the hood and stare at the engine as if I know what I'm looking at. If another man shows up, one of us will say to the other, "I used to be able to fix these things, but now with all these computers and everything, I wouldn't know where to start." We will then drink a couple of beers and break wind, as a form of holy communion.

Because I'm a man, when I catch a cold, I need someone to bring me soup and take care of me while I…

Yes, Virginia, There Is a Santa Claus!

Country Shelli sent me a link in an email about unclaimed property and I couldn't resist checking it out. As it turns out, there is still stock outstanding that my grandparents had purchased for me (under my maiden name which was two names ago) and I've got dividends sitting out there for about the last 15 years or so with claims in both Texas and Washington. I've now followed the websites' instructions and will be sending off my claims in the mail shortly. Holy sheepshit, Maynard! For a girl who is currently stressed out about money, this just goes to show me that there really *is* someone out there looking out for my interests. Can't tell you guys how grateful I am, it would be impossible to put it in words. Here's the site...

I recommend searching under every name you've ever had cuz it totally paid off for me!

Stop the So-Called Marriage Protection Amendment - AGAIN

Anti-gay groups are reigniting the battle in the Senate over the so-called Marriage Protection Amendment. The amendment should be moving through the Senate in May and could go up for a vote in early June.

The Human Rights Campaign is asking fair-minded Americans everywhere to speak out against this blatant attempt to restrict the rights and liberties of GLBT Americans.

Take action today to let your Senators know that you oppose any attempts to use Congress and the Constitution to harm same-sex couples and their children. Click here to take action now:

Back To The Grindstone...

Just an fyi for everyone, I'm heading back into hibernation for the next few months. Between spring break, the loss of two of our pets, and B's birthday, I've managed to get myself behind in school and into some debt. I may or may not be showing up to the club and I definitely won't be making many (if any) social plans. Unless a note to me has to do with real estate school, financial matters, or household things, do not expect a timely reply. I need to get my focus back and get ready to start my new career. I'll miss you all horribly and can't wait until I can start being seen again! Love you guys!

Stoner Joke on a Monday :)

Here's one from Country Shelli that made me smile this morning. Hope y'all have a happy Monday! :)

A monkey is sitting in a tree, smoking a joint, when a lizard walks past.

The lizard looks up and says to the monkey "Hey! What are you doing?"

The monkey says "Smoking a joint, come up and join me, my cold-blooded friend."

So the lizard climbs up and sits next to the monkey and they have another joint.

After a while the lizard says his mouth is 'dry', and that he's going to get a drink from the river.

At the riverbank, the lizard is so stoned that he leans too far over and falls in.

A Crocodile sees this and swims over to the stoned lizard, helping him to the side.

He then asks the lizard, "What's the matter with you?!"

The lizard explains to the crocodile that he was sitting in the tree, smoking a joint with his new monkey friend. He then explained how his mouth got dry, and that he was so wasted that, when he went to get a drink from the ri…

How Much of a Bitch Am I?

Just back from a wonderful weekend of camping which I'll blog about later. First I had to stop and take this silly quiz that I ganked from Mendy's myspace bulletin. Hope y'all had a great weekend!

I am 35% Asshole/Bitch.
I may think I am an asshole or a bitch, but the truth is I am a good person at heart. Yeah sure, I can have a mean streak in me, but most of the people I meet like me.Take the
Asshole/Bitch Test
@ FualiDotCom