A Day in the Life

Miss Melantie Jean, I can't believe you've left us already. I wasn't done knowing you, and this is totally not okay with me in any way. So much of my history, so many stories, have gone to the grave with you and I'm having a really hard time getting my head around it. I was just a kid when we met, and I'm so glad you decided to hook up with Andy so you could be my mom-person. Not just a stepmom, no, my buddy, my confidant and a role model for so many things. The first newborn kittens I ever saw were in your closet, you showed me my first episode of Saturday Night Live, the first gravestone rubbing I ever did was with you, you're the reason I did theater, my love of fashion came from you, I could go on and on about all the ways you made me who I am today. Most importantly, you taught me how to take someone else's perspective, educated me about how horrible the world can be, and showed me a kind of unconditional love that I've never experienced before o...

I had a life changing experience yesterday of the pretty awful kind. We pit stopped at a rural gas station in Louisiana and there was a seriously injured possum near where I parked, and a cop who had pulled up to the pump next to mine. I backed away from the possum and pointed at it so the cop saw what was up. He aimed his gun at it while I got in the car to move to another pump. At the time, I wondered if discharging a weapon near a gas pump might be dangerous and I hoped he wouldn't need to use it. I also didn't look that way just in case he did end up shooting it. The possum never moved, he was jacked up like maybe got hit by a car and was terrified...you could see it in his eyes. I know from experience they can be immobile for hours when they're scared, so I wasn't too stressed but was watchful. Meanwhile, my traveling companion went inside the store and the clerk called animal control. The cop went inside the store and we all shopped and whatever before heading...

I'm having a breakdown and I'm strangely comfortable with it. I've been the sad version of myself since last summer and the rest of my emotions are somewhere in the distance. I can see them but can't quite get there, not really, not fully. I've been struggling with major depression and have had many days where upright on the couch (vs. fetal position in the bed) was the best I could do. I've barely been working, I haven't wanted to leave the house much, and I've become more and more introverted as the months pass. It's safe to say I'm a very hot mess right now. Over the last month things have been changing inside me at a scary fast rate, and here's how it happened... Several months ago, a dear friend sent me over this video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1Evwgu369Jw which is an animated short about Empathy vs Sympathy. It resonated with me in a way that caused me to go back and keep watching it. Fast forward to the snow/ice week...

I had the opportunity to go with My Sissy and my niece (aka Mini Me) to my niece’s first “cattle call” audition Thursday and it was a blog-worthy experience for sure. The show is X Factor and there were literally thousands of people from all over the country auditioning in Dallas. This was my first experience with a situation like this and I was not impressed with the lack of organization on the show’s part. It seemed like they didn’t properly anticipate the amount of hopefuls and nothing went as smoothly as it could have throughout the day. Still tho, it was fascinating… They got all registered on Wednesday morning and brought me a copy of the image release, I’ve never seen such a thorough document in all my life. It actually said they have the right to use any image they got of me throughout the universe and for eternity…I could not make this stuff up. I signed it even though I’m not thrilled by the thought of images of me running around without my control but I had to go support the...

Okay yes, I realize I'm not in the Philippines anymore but I ran across this post that I wrote while I was there and thought I might as well post it anyway. Hope y'all enjoy! ------------------- Here locally, it’s very clear that the 80s came here to die. It’s so strange to me to hear Air Supply, Asia, and Journey on the radio on a regular basis. Okay, seriously, am I in a time warp? The strangest thing is that they don’t play any of the really good music that came out of the 80s (there was a ton), they only play the really sappy love songs. And it’s not on the oldies station, it’s on the popular station, mixed in with hip hop, dance, native pop music, and a Xmas carol thrown in every now and then for variety. So very strange, this soundtrack… A couple of weeks ago, Eric and I were sitting in a bar having lunch and the parallels between now and our time in Cali together (sans romance, of course) were notable. We’re on an adventure together in a strange place where Madonna play...

The national religion here is Catholicism and oh boy, it shows. There are pregnant women and kids literally everywhere. The religious imagery at the stores is a bit overwhelming and elaborate. Of course, I live in a mainly Hispanic neighborhood back home, so it’s not complete culture shock. Here’s something strange: every day at 6 pm, there is a moment of prayer. The first time Mike and I witnessed it we were at the grocery store and this disembodied voice came over the loud speaker which caused everyone to literally stop in their tracks. We just looked at each other not really knowing what was going on and if we should keep shopping or what. Total wtf moment. Apparently it happens in all the public areas like stores and malls daily. The girls in the cafeteria at work listen to Christian radio every morning, so we’ve started joking that we eat breakfast with Jesus. It’s actually quite surreal but sometimes when they’re on the “thought of the day” part there’s a message there for me. Gu...

More picture links for those not on Facebook... Our Halloween party: http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=233578&id=588038946&l=9bbee5f156 Island Hopping: http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=234517&id=588038946&l=80b5c8c176 Downtown Cebu and Magellan's Cross: http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=235583&id=588038946&l=64dcc26208 The Amazing Show: http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=236115&id=588038946&l=ccb7fad2b1 Day of the Dead Cemetery Tour: http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=237122&id=588038946&l=7bda504e83 General Pix of the Trip (updated): http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=226582&id=588038946&l=5010c126ca I'll try to do an actual blog soon. :)